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Archive for August, 2010

I am not sure why I am going to try and number these. I tried to number my “Inside the Mind” posts and that got annoying, but maybe it is more for me than you. I like knowing how many I have written, and it gives me some sort of order – which we know I need.

Today’s topic of madness: Marriage. It is a thing of madness. If you aren’t married, sorry you are probably not going to care about this post.

So here are my top three things I wish I would have heard, that I now try to tell everyone who is about to get married (although sometimes I feel like a kill joy, it will ultimately make the marriage more enjoyable):

3. What you normally hear: Marriage is sacred.  What I wish I would have heard: Marriage should be treated as if it is sacred but it doesn’t become sacred on its own. Being married isn’t automatically this thing that is “full of dedication” or “secured against violation” the sacredness does not come from the fact that you are married, it comes from the actively pursuing having a sacred marriage. Does that make sense? You have to continually be on guard against everything trying to break up your marriage, because there are things that try and get in the way and you really just need to spiritually slap them in the face.

2. What you normally hear: Your first year will be so fun, expect great things! What I wish I would have heard: There is nothing like your first year of marriage.
Ok that is kind of false leading. Ha 🙂 Your first year is challenging, and that makes it great, but not necessarily fun all the time. Sometimes it is fun, sometimes it makes your brain tired, sometimes it makes you laugh, sometimes it makes you cry. Not to mention every third person that passes you says “How’s married life?”  When I’m asked how married life is I always say “It’s a learning experience” because on days when Joseph does something super sweet, I learn that I can be surprised at how thoughtful he is and then on days when we have a disagreement I learn something from it- so it is always a safe answer. There is a lot of self-less-ness involved in marriage if you are going to fully appreciate your spouse. I’m so glad Joseph is so self-less when it comes to me (not many other things.. hehe).

1. What you hear:Marriage is 50/50 you both have to put in effort.  What I wish I would have heard: Marriage takes 100% of everything in you, if you are going to get the most out of your marriage.
No wonder so many marriages fail if people are thinking they are only responsible for half of the work. 50% effort from each person does not result in a 100% marriage, it results in 50% effort. The husband and wife need to be 100% focused and dedicated to the marriage, you aren’t half a person without your spouse…that is such a weird phrase, but you are two wholes that are made more whole and holy by the joining of marriage. You have to give of your complete self, holding nothing back.

So, that is my two cents on the first 7 months of marriage. Also sorry if we never hang out with you, marriage also equals being busy all the time. 🙂

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Since I feel like I never have time to write, I’m going to start doing some 15 minute madness updates on life/thoughts/etc during my breaks at work. Not every day, maybe not even every week, but still more often than I have been.

Today’s agenda: I am terrible at organization.

Seriously, my hamper looks like it thru up and then ate itself and then thru up again. This would be one of my many “minus one” for the wife. Joseph is a neat freak. Is that a rude term? He is a neat person. Is that an ambiguous statement? He is orderly.

I wish I was that everything color coordinated, I-don’t-wear-things-twice kind of person. However, I’m not. I have no shame in stretching those jeans to day four and five, yikes. I also am guilty of putting something in the hamper and maybe getting it back out. Embarrassing, I know. I can’t lie about that though, or Joseph would call me out on it.

So, why does this matter? I feel guilty about it sometimes! God gives you things = you take care of things = leaving your crap everywhere is most likely not being a good steward of what He has given. Case and point? I’m going to try to get caught up on laundry this weekend, and if I don’t…I’m trying to think of a good consequence.

Suggestion? Seriously, bring it. I’m open for ideas.

Let me leave you with this picture: http://www.webmastergrade.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/Cute-Baby.jpg

Cute and you know it.

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